Have been wasting lots of time. I dunno why I am doing that. But I just need to unwind and rest. Even rotting and staring into space will be fine. Haha... Currently, there has been yet many more things on my mind. I don't know what's wrong with me.

I was packing my cupboard that day and I realized the things that were there two years ago was still there. Everything that she left or gave me was still inside the cupboard. Haha... I picked up those keychains that we enjoyed going around to like buy and collect, I started reminiscing. Then I snapped and "woke up". I shouldn't think any further. Hahaha... So I put it back at the same corner of my cupboard. I don't know why I did that but I just thought those things belonged there so I kept it at the same spot again. Haha... Lame... I am not making sense!!

Recently, I reconnected with some ex-TPJCians. Haha... They asked me whether I am still in contact with the ex-s05 people? I felt sad as I said no, I seemed to have lost contact with them. They asked how are those people in your clique? I couldn't answer as I am no longer with them. I felt sad that things had turned out this way. I almost choked on my own saliva. I really felt very ashamed of myself that I sucked so much that people are leaving me behind. Over the years as people who were once friends left me, I learned and I tried to reform and transform myself. I hope the second half of my life is a better one. I hope nobody leaves me alone anymore. I hope I wouldn't have to say I have lost contact with everyone in uni a few years down the road.

Alright. Enough of those wimpy emo moments. Its time to sleep. I am so physically and mentally drained although I haven't been productive these few days. Hope for a better future. =]

Time really flies. School has started for a few weeks already. And I havn't done any concrete studying much less mugging. This sem I am in classes with people that I don't know but of course now I know them. Everyone thinks I am damn hardworking and has gpa 4.99. Haha... Jokes... My tutorials are like half past six. 5 questions I do 2 only kind. I never even put in 50% of my energy into it. No longer were my tutorial answers standard answers like as though if the exam asked the same questions it will be exactly answered in the way my tutorial were. Now my tutorials are like in point form and no structuring. That explains why I dropped out of dean's list and slowly became a borderline 2nd upper class.

Being in the final year is stressed not because of the lessons and studies but because everyone starts to be concerned about the future and their career. Going for networking and recruitment talks. Suddenly, I feel I have aged. I am grown up. I will be entering the workforce soon. And I realized, I am specializing in a course that is really hard to get a good job. I realized we are in a rat race. Doing things for the sake of doing. Because everyone is doing it so if I don't have the same thing on my resume, the resume lacklustre. People started planning and building their resume since year 1 and year 2, but I chose to rot away thinking that I wouldn't want to be involved in this kind of rat race. Thinking that I have the leadership skills, and what not. But the truth is the society wants evidence, they want experienced personnels. You can believe in yourself, you can have the potential and you can really have those skills but people just wouldn't believe unless you have something to prove your worth.

Of course those who were under my leadership before will disagree that I have what it takes to be a leader cos I can get very domineering at times, and at times incompetent. SO? Haha... I know very well why I don't want to do certain things and I persist in certain things as a leader. I am not shirking responsibilities, but a leader do not do everything and a leader need not be the best amongst the group. A leader is a good judger and a good dedicator. For instance when I feel that a particular team member is good at this, I hand over the baton to him/her. Thats the spirit. We work as a team. I don't want to be a leader who put leashes on my team members like as though they were dogs under my command, pulling them along the road only to find that the they are choking and suffocating. At times, I am indecisive not because I do not have a view but because I want to hear from each and everyone in the team. I want to involve everyone in the decision making process. However, I am domineering when I don't buy your idea because you must convince me why you choose this right? I realised from my experience as a leader from work last time with CPF Board (yes i get paid extra to lead a team of 4 customer service officer. Haha... But I worked for two weeks only), and in school. Its really different. At work, people are more professional and they appreciate a decentralized form of leadership because it makes them feel important. In school, people seem to prefer a centralized form of leadership. I wonder why. Will they carry this kind of work ethics and attitude to their future careers next time? Then again, I seldom emerge as a team leader in baf projects while I always lead accounting groups. It makes many wonder why I am not main sepcializing in accountancy.

Haha... Edwin asked me so many times before and I couldn't answer him. Haha... I love studying accounting subjects, and I must admit i dun enjoy working in accounting field. But it runs in my family's blood. I grew up in an accounting family. My sis, my cousins are all auditors and accountants. Hahaha... So yeah. Hardly anyone in the family is in a different profession. Will I end up in the accounting field as well or will I break the tradition? Hmmmmzzz... Although, I demonstrated great potential during my internship and the SCS people has been persuading me to join them after graduation, I am hesitant about it. Because I don't like accounting jobs. Maybe because I can do them well and it becomes not challenging. I don't want to waste my prime years doing unchallenging stuff like data entry. The only motivator that I can think of to join SCS finance team would be the work environment because its really a nice and relaxed place to work in. Welll... Don't know. To quote Mr A (he says that apparently banks google their applicant's names, so I cannot mention his name on my blog) "Life's is hard!!!"

I am getting on with age and many people have entered the phase when they consider marriage with their partners. Suddenly, I feel like although I am of the same age as them, I am still walking on the same spot while others have advanced to another phase of life. I yearn for a lifetime partner but its not say I want den I faster go and find one gf. People always asks me why don't you go and find a gf? Can you don't set too high standards? Just accept. The point is how do I FIND? Its love we are talking about. We need the sparks. I don't have high standards. I don't need a pretty gf. I need someone whom I have sparks with and someone who thinks and have similar mindset as me. Ya... So I don't know how to find a gf because to find is like just to have a gf for the sake of having a gf because you need a gf. Right? Thats why I always tell Mr A, don't go and chase a ger just cos you need a relationship. You chase and be nice to the ger because you want her to be your gf. But in the end, its just for the sake of having a gf. Soon, you grow tired of being nice and you complain and whin why am I alwaes giving? The reason is you don't even love her when you set out to chase her? You just needed her as your gf. When you love someone you won't feel tired of giving. And when there is mutual love, there is mutual giving and taking. Hence, until now its complicated. Haha... Well, when will fate come? Guess next time I will go speed dating like how Linda goes for it. She told me that it last you for a good deal of time because you get to know alot of people. Haha... Not that in school you don't meet alot of people but the fact is 89% of the people you meet are attached. Of the remaining 11% singles, there just aren't sparks and it is just so crystal clear that its impossible. Hur hur... hahahaa... The difference with knowing the many people on speedates is all are single and the organizer will match your attributes to others for the sessions. So people you meet there are pretty close to your league. haha... Yeah... Heard of Linda's speed dating stories. Like so fun. hahaha...

Alright pretty long entry. I think nobody could have made it to this point. Hahahaa... Alright... Koda Kumi - Moon Crying MV Its quite a nice song. =]

I love strategic management tutorials. Its alwaes so fun! Haha... The tutor is like one of the best tutors I have came across in NTU. He is good because he don't give you the answers to the tutorial questions. So why then is he good? Because he moulds your thinking. His style of teaching lets you see things in different persepctives and he spurs and encourage you to think think and think. And continuous thinking generates great ideas. Yeah. So its fun.

Unfortunately, recently in my classes there seem to be an increase in the number of retarded people. Retarded meaning when the tutor says there are 2 cases, the person asks so there are 2 cases is it? Okie get the idea of retarded people? Haha... Today, in my strategic management class, the tutor gave us an option to do a write up of the case we went through today using the way he taught us to approach the questions. On top of that, he added that its up to us to decide whether we want to do it as a group work or an individual one. Then the retarded person ask: "So, the write up is individual???" The whole class burst into laughter. Then throughout the whole lesson when we were discussing the case, the retarded student asked alot of stupid questions which obviously revealed that she never read the case because all the answers to her questions were inside the case and non value add to the discussion. Its like... Haha... Ya... Alright I shall stop slamming lest I get karma.

Alex commented on my dressing today. hahaha.... Damn funny. "Can you stop acting like a rich kid?" Haha... I was like "nah... my stuff is all cheap!" Alright at least for today, everything that I wore was like $20. I wore a Baleno polo tee, a bugis street berms, a digital watch all retailing at $20 each. Well except for my loafers which is only 60 plus as compared to a 90 plus one you can get off the racks of Pedro. Haha... So... I am not acting like a rich kid wad... I wear cheapo clothes. Then he commented on my pen. OMg.... Even your pen is expensive. Like erms... Its like just a uniball jetstream pen mahz... Anyways it was a gift from my AA101 tutor. So ya... Haha... Its not an expensive pen also. Its probably only $3 at most. Then he told Lionel see Zhanyi, he dresses so well to school! Look at us!! He is quite stylist ya?

Haha... Okie jokes. He is funny. Alright time for tv... =]

I have been busy with lots of things. Haha... I wanted to blog about alot of things for instance people thinking that I am a designer when I went to buy things. Hahaha... Candy will know the story because I have told her about it. Haha... Lazy to blog about it. Wanted to blog about some things but on second thought I think I shouldn't. Still coughing although I have finished the course of my antibotics and anit-inflammatory medicine. Tired. Time to sleep. Haha...

I have so much to do but I am all drowsy and tired after medication. I have been trying hard to do the FYP preliminary research but I am too shagged out to do it. I am still at A. I am in charged of A-J!! OMG! Okie.



After dinner went bugis street to shop. Haha... Then we went Ah Chew's desserts for DUH! dessert!!!!!!!! Haha... There was a long queue and I think the wait is worth it. Its damn nice and the price is CHEAP! The mango sago with pomelo is good. Love it. =]

I woke up early intending to go gym and run. I ended up coughing non stop and I decided that I should just stay home. Went to see doctor and took medication. No doubt my throat is like not pianful and sore anymore after medication, the cough is getting worst? The frequency of the cough is like more often. Dunno. Whatever.

I am torn between the brown and the black one. Haha... Black one looks very sophisticated but brown one looks more outstanding. Hmmmzz...

Starting from the left Brando the chihuahua, Oliver the Pug and Agnese the bulldog. Haha... There are other dogs too. Haha... Artu the dachshund, Leroy the french bulldog, Lulu the poodle and Sam the beagle.

Anyways, the LV Damier Graphite is in Singapore already! Haha... Its an outdated news, I bet everyone knows about it already. But I just found out today mahz. hahaha... So ya... I must announce here.

Alright coughing again. Time for work. Gonna be out until very late today even though I am sick. Haha... You know more fresh air makes a speedier recovery. Hahaa... I havn't been posting word of the day. Haha... I am posting one today.

Sick and tired. Mistakes in choices cause distress. But its an experience that mould and transform you. People who never make mistakes will never overcome their own limits because they can't see their shortcomings and hence they always think that they are on thte right track. Subsequently they follow the same track everytime. And so they remain as a train never upgrading into a sports car. Haha... Okie... My analogy is bad. I believe in going the extra mile. But I am impatient. Enough said. Time to sleep.

The cough is making me stay wide awake. The cough is making me lose appetite. The cough is making me very lethargic, restless and lax of concentration and focus for work. Bad. I hate coughs. It saps your energy away from your body.

Illness apart. I guess I have snapped out of confusion and emo-ness. Its so pointless. Should just move on. Should just distract myself and concentrate on other things. Increased tuition to twice a week. Delivered all the orders I need to deliver today before sch starts. Received payment. =] Tried my best to finish all accounting tutorials. =]

I love the feeling of being busy. Its fun. Its keeps you occupied. Its keeps those loneliness at bay. And when all this all gone, you can concentrate at the one thing you do at that one time because at other times you will not have the time to complete that same task. So ya... Its good. =]

Saw Jiaqi in school today. haha... He was like you became so skinny! What happened? Haha... Yeah... I am like one size smaller now. My weight dropped. Cos I stopped going to the gym and I stopped exercising and eating like a glutton. I MUST start again. Yawnz... Sick and tired. Hate it.

Enough whining! Time to sleep. =] Tomorrow will definitely be a better day!!

I haven't been in the best of moods these days. I have been trying hard to stay out of those emo-ness and ratonalize something. Somehow, feelings just overcame all my efforts. I am having a sore throat due to sleepless nights. I would be lying to say that NO, I am not emo now. My work are all left undone. I tried my best to digest those scotts textbook articles but to no avail sian-ness overcame my concentration level. Haha... The good thing is buisness is still going on. Some lunny placed three orders with me over the phone at 3am. Haha... Jokes... He was like omg you are awake? Like ya... You call so I am awake to do your buisness. Haha... FYI, I am selling clothes on Keeptouch forums so ya... Haha... Money are so hard to earn. Haiz... Broke Broke. Money in, money out! I went to order contact lens this afternoon. Haha... So poof! Money out. I hate glasses because I keep breaking them and the lens get blurred easily.

Was talking to Linda just now because she was surprisingly on msn on a Sunday afternoon and it means she is back in office. So I intiated a chat with her. She was like me, disturbed by some matters. Haha... So we talked about our stories. As usual when both of us chat somehow we make jokes out of ourselves. Haha... I realised after leaving SCS, I havn't been laughing so loudly. Haha... It takes people of the exact same frequency, thinking, mentality, intelligence to make one happy. Haha... Of course I am not saying me and Linda share exactly the same frequency and etc. but we have the same point of view and attitude about life.

Oh I went to get a cheap haircut on friday. Haha... Some lousy salon opposite my house. I am on budget now, so no more expensive haircuts from kimage, chapter 2 or Team Salon. Haha... But I regretted not spending more money on a good haircut. It was bad! Haha... The hairdresser (not stylist because she cannot style hair properly) use three big plam full of clay to style my hair. Haha... My head was so heavy until I thought it was going to fall off. Haha... The clay is a good hairstyling product and there wasn't a need to use so much! Its cos she didn't do a good job cutting. Haha... So the moral of the story go to the back to the same stylist at the same place for haircuts. Haha...

Was talking to my buddy Ri Hui who is still in aussie ytd night. He told me the same thing as everyone else told me about something. But I am stubborn. I never did heeded everyone's advices about this matter. Haha... Sometimes, emotions, feelings and intuition do really supercede rationality so much so that you know that the truth is this but you choose to believe otherwise. Humans are like that most of the time, that is what differentiate us from machines. Feelings can be a bane as well as a boon in different circumstances. As we experience life, it is important for us to juggle and manage our feelings and exercise rationality from time to time to avoid distress, sad-ness and protecting ourselves from being hurt. It is difficult, but I am learning. =]

潘玮柏 - 转机

I am bored. I realised I havn't been at home on friday nights ever since school ended last sem and I went for my internship. Haha... Now that school resume, its back to normal. I am home most of the time and I eat my mum's dinner everyday. =] Its as good as those restaurant food. I swear. Now that I am spending so little on food everyday, I realised I was damn spendthrift when it comes to food when I was working. I dine in restuarants 90% of the time except for the one time I dine at East Coast hawker with my supervisor Linda on a fateful friday when both of us were bored and had no activities. Haha... Bored me surfed the net and found spring 2009 collections again. Haha... So I remembered I wanted to post a few of the looks I like. Haha...

Spring 2009

Here are the looks I like from the Spring 2009 collections. =]

男人女人 - 阿穆隆 许茹芸

Okie, I discovered this song from susan's blog. Haha... I copy you... Don't mind ya? Haha... I think its a nice song. =]


女:爱爱爱爱了几回 也明白其中滋味
付出的从来不会等于收回
我却还在等待着谁能出现

男:伤伤伤伤了几回 也曾经为爱憔悴
爱情里好人总比坏人狼狈
我却还是学不会狠心 对谁

女:男人男人多希望你是好人
多希望用你的真让我不必再心疼

男:女人女人我答应做个好人
我答应用我一生来换你的快乐 一生

女:爱爱爱爱了几回 也明白其中滋味
付出的从来不会等于收回
我却还在等待着谁能出现

男:伤伤伤伤了几回 也曾经为爱憔悴
爱情里好人总比坏人狼狈
合:我却还是学不会狠心 对谁

女:男人男人多希望你是好人
多希望用你的真让我不必再心疼

男:女人女人我答应做个好人
我答应用我一生来换你的快乐 一生

女:男人男人多希望你是好人
多希望用你的真让我不必再心疼

男:女人女人我答应做个好人
合:不会再让我(你)心疼
一等再等你就是我等的那个人

男:男人男人
女:女人女人
合:多么希望你是对的人

Its Wednesday! School started already! I am still in holiday mood. Haha... Time to get my ass moving. Time to MUG! haha... I shall slack for the first week and start studying from week 2 onwards. =]

The Ark invited me to pariticipate in their 9th annual singing competition. Oh my, I am surprised. Haha... I have left that place for years and they actually still have my contacts? Coooollsss... Haha... But still need to pay $25 to register for the competition. Yawnz... Hahaha... The top prize is $1000. But knowing the fact that my voice is not the best amongst the singers there, of course I cannot win lahz. Hahaha... Haiz... dunno whether I should go and give it a try. Considering... The main reason that is stopping me is I need to dedicate alot of time for that and forgo time for like studying and some other stuffs. Hmmzz... Shall see if Yihan is participating together with me.. Haha... FYI, Yihan's voice is a hybrid of Wang Li Hong and Jay Chou and he is so busy that he never makes it for any ktv sessions with me. =[ Hahaha... I improved liaoz okie... Yihan... Next time KTV with me you will be stunned... I found my bass le! Though my nasal is still quite strong. Haha...

Enough of my singing interest. Now for my other interest fashion. I was looking at Spring 2009 collection and I found a few looks I like very much... Shall post tml... Time to sleep. Cos lessons starts at 830 tml! Yawnz...

The GEEK goes to watch Red Cliff and dinner with Guiying today. Haha... Wearing this age old black army specs makes me feel geeky. Probably I turn into a freaky geek and get As for all subjects this sem with this specs. Haha... Suddenly I think I look so good with this age old black army specs. Haha... I wore my HARE shirt. =] Red Cliff was GOOODD!!! Those who hvn't watched it please go and watch! The strategies were like so brilliant. Zhuge Liang is my favourite character. Haha... Both in this movie and in Dynasty Warriors. Cos in Dynasty Warriors, Zhuge Liang uses his fan to shoot laser-like beams on enemies, which is super powerful. Haha... Had dinner at Sun with Moon. Its very nice. Let the pictures talk.

蕭敬騰-原諒我



This song is very nice. I like the melody and the lyrics.

請不要分了以後　還記得親吻過的承諾
你的永久已不屬於我
默默低頭　那時我很多話哽在喉嚨

你的笑　你的快樂　不是我愛太多　想太多
我能感受他比我適合
愛放了手　我偽裝冷漠　比你先說分手

請原諒我　原諒我不成熟
不愛你是藉口　好讓你離開我
請原諒我　好想自私將你佔有
一個寂寞就給我承受　換你過更好的生活

請不要分了以後　還記得親吻過的承諾
你的永久已不屬於我
默默低頭　那時我很多話哽在喉嚨

你的笑　你的快樂　不是我愛太多　想太多
我能感受他比我適合
愛放了手　我偽裝冷漠　比你先說分手

請原諒我　原諒我不成熟
不愛你是藉口　好讓你離開我
請原諒我　好想自私將你佔有
一個寂寞就給我承受　換你過更好的生活

愛過恨過哭過也笑過　
親吻過你的脆弱　其實我比誰都要懦弱

原諒我　必須假裝愛錯
別讓時間倒流　我怕說不出口
原諒我　沒有解釋太多心痛
別無所求　徹底忘了我　愛原來要捨得

我難過　我才懂

Feeling all GEEKY today. Haha... See...I wore my black specs out today because I felt very geeky. Haha... Yeah... So... =] Today is the saturday before school starts and I couldn't get anyone to go out with me. Candy wants to be a filial daughter, so she can't go out with me. Guiying is busy. Abner is doing his foreign exchange competition. Nevertheless, I decided I shouldn't rot my saturday away by staying at home. So I brought my Rich Dad, Poor dad; water bottle; MP3 player and went out alone. I decided that since I wasn't rushing for time, I shall take a long bus ride to Bugis on bus number 2 and then walk to Haji Lane to walk walk see see and shop shop. So I listened to my MP3 player, read my Rich Dad, Poor Dad and before I realised the bus reached Bugis. So fast mehz? Hahaha...

When I reached Haji Lane, I saw lots of fashionable people standing around. COoolss... Its a rare sight in Singapore. Hahaha... I think a large proportion were not local. The shops is very nice and the service is freaking good. It didn't feel like Singapore. Haha... You can enter a shop and go out the shop empty handed but the sales person will still say thank you byebye see you next time in a sincere and friendly tone. In Singapore boutiques, you hardly find thank you bye bye in such a sincere tone, much of it is like a routine and regulation which makes thank you byebye sounds so very bo chap and buay song. So ya... There are lots of labels that are not seen in normal boring Singapore shops. I saw Umbro Kim Jones! I saw PLAY! I saw Comme Des Garcons! I saw a Fred Perry Comme Des Garcon full leather bag! So exciting! I saw lots of vintage clothing as well.

And of all brands, I must see the brand HARE in a shop with a pretty sales girl. OHHHH.... HARE!!! I love this brand. They have very unique shirts with perfect cuts for skinny guys like me. I was so excited when I saw so many HARE shirts. And and the sales girl is pretty! She is so funny. She was like oh this brand is from Japan and its very popular. Haha.. I was like I KNOW!!!! Then she laughed and said I am very cute. Jokes. Then she started introducing all the different designs. Cooolllsss... And and they have the very IN berms shorts with very interesting details and some have suspenders and nice side pockets. My 20 bucks berms shorts are pale in comparison in terms of construction, details and workmanship. So I stayed in the shop for so very long until finally under the spell of the pretty lady, I bought a HARE shirt and she gave me 10% discount. So there goes 10% of my July pay. Hahaha... Its 62 bucks. I should stop spending. OMG! OKie... But probably nobody have heard of this brand. So come come... Let me introduce the webbie to you all... Hahaha... http://www.hare.jp/ and http://www.hare-ec.jp/index.do =]

I also went to this shop with alot of limited edition shoes. As in really limited edition and not those you see in the Heerens Limited Edition Shoes Shop. The shoes in this shop are like rare sights which is quite hard to be spotted in Singapore. Oh... So Narccisstic me saw a big mirror there and I took a photo of myself. Okie I am beginning to love my loafers because it so comfy and conveinent! No socks no nothing, slop... slip in and you are ready to go. Everyone should get themselves a pair of loafers! Okie for guys lahz. Hahaha...

So, the bottomline is Haji Lane is a good place to shop. I LOVE IT! Haha... But be sure to get your wallets to be fireproof cos spending there will burn a hole in your wallet. Haha... Thats all for today. Sometimes, we can be as happy when we spend time alone. =]

Yesterday met Yiling and Lee Peng for Dark Knight. Haha... The show is good. =] Then we went Miss Clarity for dinner.